TIPS ON BOOKING YOURSELF
(published Dec 1994 - Juice Magazine)
Written by Dick Hodgin --  m80@nando.net

Trying to get gigs for yourself or your band can be about as much fun as
taking an enema with an electric carving knife...Well, maybe not THAT much.
The fun part is when you get your phone bill. That's when you realize why
the booking agents charge a hefty 10 - 15- 20% of a gig "just to make a few
phone calls". Getting the phone numbers to the club, finally getting
someone on the phone, (just to find out that you're not calling the correct
number for bookings,) calls regarding production, more calls to get info on
media, radio stations and anything else can put you into MA BELL kinda
deep. stablishing connections is the game.

That's what the agents are charging for, the information and the contacts.
It takes years to cultivate the relationships and info required to
adequately approach the brick wall of booking a band, not to mention
knowing what to say once you get the booking person on the phone.

If you have ever tried to book yourself, you've probably found out that
there's more to it than just calling some club and asking for a date. It
used to be that a band could make a few calls, throw their shit in the
truck and tour the country making anywhere from $100 - $200 per night just
because they were a band willing to travel.. NOT ANY MORE!

With the stupid ineffective drinking laws that went into effect all around
the country, club business has taken a nose dive that, coupled with the
glut of new bands makes it almost impossible to get gigs unless you're
SOMEBODY. (in 1990 almost 400 bands in NC submitted demos for the NORTH
CAROLINA MUSIC SHOWCASE - can you say "the market is crowded?")

It used to be that a band with a record out was something special. Now
almost every band has a release out. What makes you special now, is what
your record is doing . Is it selling? Is it in local stores? Is it being
played on the radio? Is it being played on college radio? Where is it on
CMJ?  - HARD REPORT?- ROCKPOOL? - BILLBOARD POP 200 YET?  How are your
numbers in POLLSTAR?  Do you have any press, and if you do, what kind of
press.  SPIN?  ROLLING STONE? BILLBOARD?  NY TIMES?  ARE YOU DRAWING
CROWDS???

Now you may be saying to yourself " yeah like dude we're just getting
started" . Yeah, well that just means you're that far behind the bands that
DO have those kinds of credentials.(and there are a shit-load of them out
there too!)

I'm not saying you're not as good, just way behind. That's exactly the
stuff club owners and promoters are looking for in the bands they're giving
the jobs to. There are bands on MAJOR LABELS with killer college airplay
begging for opening act slots!

Ask yourself. Why should a club owner book you or your band? Because you're
good? Hell! There are tons of bands out there that are good. Because you
draw a crowd in your home town? So What! What does that mean in THEIR town?
Because you'll play for cheap? He's got a list of 30 to 50 bands that will
play for FREE! (And a few that will pay him to play) You've got to be
special in some respect, or you've got to figure out a way to get the
booking person to give you a chance to show what you can do. You've got to
show him how you can start drawing crowds to his venue.

I know it seems like just the easiest thing in the world to keep up with
what you're doing, but it can get confusing and a mistake (double-booking /
non confirmation) can be costly.  I personally like those big
"month-at-a-time" desk calendars. It covers the coffee stains on my desk
and the big numbers/squares are soothing to my tiny brain. Make sure that
you do your work in pencil. The calendar will mutate before your very eyes
and it's good to erase rather than mark out. For those of you fortunate
enough to have rich parents that bought you a computer you can order our
CALENDAR program that does everything for you but it's still good to have
that paper calendar.

Once a week, talk with everyone in the band about THEIR schedules. Find out
from your band members how far in advance you can book something. IT'S
IMPORTANT TO BE ABLE TO ACCEPT AN OFFER ON THE PHONE without having to call
the booking person back. If you're hesitant, the job may go to someone else
who's not. Make notes on the calendar regarding who can work & when. If
someone is going to be completely un-available, mark it big so you don't
forget and book a gig.

Mark a gig with a (T) for tentative until you've actually got it, then
erase the (T). You wouldn't believe how many mistakes take place because
someone didn't understand that it was a firm deal. It also helps you to
look at sections dates and think about routing. If the (T) is still there,
maybe the gig can be moved or swapped with another band. Make sure your
band members know about changes you've made.

Keep a phone log of every call you make. Mark the date, time called, number
called, how long you talked, name of establishment and who you spoke with.
This will get very tiresome but it's important. First it lets you look back
and remember the conversation. Second, it helps to write down when to call
people back. When a booking person says, "call me next Friday", they don't
mean next Thursday . Third, you may not believe this, but the phone
companies' equipment actually makes a mistake now and again. (the worst one
I've ever had was only about $140.00 one month) Check your log against your
phone bill immediately when you get it. Call the phone company right away
and let them know about any discrepancies. Deduct the mistakes from your
phone bill. Fourth, the log also gives you a record of how much money
you're spending on the phone so that when you DO get a gig, and it DOES pay
you some money, you can reimburse the paying person.

Well now you've got some tools to use. It's time to make the call.

It's never easy to talk with a booking person who has no idea who the hell
you are. Put yourself in their shoes for a minute. Imagine what's it's like
to get 25 - 50 calls a day from bands (and agents) that want to tell you
how great they are, not to mention the other calls you have to handle about
the bands that you DO book, plus talking with the press people, the flyer
people, the beer salesman, the radio station, the P.A. people,
blah-de-blah, and so on and so forth. Hell I'm tired already . You really
don't want to blow anyone off, but your also tired of hearing the same old
bullshit. Who do you think invented the answering machine?  A fed-up club
owner!  Keep in mind that these people are busy people. Don't take up any
more of their time than absolutely necessary. Let your tape and credentials
do the talking.

WHEN: The best time I've found to call for a booking is between 1PM and
5PM. It's different for everyone, but most club people stay up fairly late
in the AM and don't get started with their business day until the
afternoon. It's not the best time to try to talk business when they just
got up.

MAKE THE CALL If you get an assistant : Identify yourself, give them your
name and which band you represent. Tell them that you're calling about a
booking. Most probably, the assistant will tell you right off that you need
to go ahead and send the DEMO and the PRESS KIT. Don't try to get any
further. The assistant is there for a reason. Don't piss them off! They can
be your best ally, or they can be your worst enemy. Thank them for their
time and ask if you could get the correct mailing address to send the info.

Be polite.

Ask them when a good time to try to reach the booking person would be after
they get the info. Don't try to sell yourself to the assistant. Be relaxed,
be yourself , but don't try to be some hot-shot booking agent type. If you
get the real booking person, identify yourself and band. If your band has
been playing out for awhile, ask them if they're familiar with the name. If
they're not, give them a VERY BRIEF description and a credential or two.

EXAMPLE: "Hi! this is Joe Blo and I'm with a band called the BUTT FARMERS,
("Hi") Are you familiar with them? ("no") Well, we're an alternative band
out of Raleigh and we've been playing around the Triangle for about a year.
We're trying to expand out to some other areas like..(his town's name
here)" and we were interested in talking with you about a date.

If you have any air play on stations that service their area, mention it.
"Yeah, they're playing our cd on WXXx and we thought it would be a good
time to try to do some shows in your area" ("yeah, well we're kinda booked
up right now") "I understand, would it be all right if I just send you some
info and tape on the band, we're trying to schedule some shows in your area
right now for blah-de-blah week, and maybe we can put something together
for then."

Try to make the first contact as brief as possible if they're un-familiar
with your group. If they have heard of you , don't try to impress them with
statements like "REALLY?". The proper response would be "Good!" then go
straight to the "looking for a date" mode.

When they're ready to talk with you about a booking, (if you're kinda new)
they usually don't come right out and offer you the date. Instead, they'll
probably want to look at their calendar and check out some possibilities.
Cross check available dates of theirs with available dates of yours to
determine the time frame. Have your calendar ready. KNOW your open dates.
If the only dates they have open are booked for you, determine if their
date is more desirable to you. Don't cancel a premium money date for a
so-so opening act slot unless you feel like that's the only date they're
going to be able to offer you.

Some venues are so hard to get into that it's wise to accept anything! You
may have to wait 6 months for another offer. If they offer you one date,
chances are they'll offer you another, but when? Sometimes it's tough to
determine if you should take one date over another date. Talk it over with
your group. Ask some other bands that have played the new venue how they're
doing at this place. An opening act slot in front of say, FISHBONE may look
great until you find out that no one goes into the club until the headliner
goes on. You have to weigh a lot of factors. You won't always make the
right decision, but it's not the end of the world if you fuck up. There
will be other opportunities. Keep the long-range big picture in mind. When
they say they have the XXth date open, and YOU have that date open too,
then you say "yeah, we could do that date, let me get some information from
you."

NOW THE MONEY!!! No one knows exactly what to ask for when you do your
first deal with a new club.. It takes a series of maneuvers and posturing
to actually arrive on a deal. My favorite line is "now what kind of money
can we do on this date?".

It's short and to the point. It also throws the ball into their court. To
which most of them will respond "I don't know, what do you need?". Review
the venue size. Ask what that night of the week is like as opposed to other
nights. Try to price yourself the first time in such a fashion that will
guarantee your expenses, and if you have an unusually good attendance,
you'll get some bonus money. Ask the booking person what kinds of
guarantees they are able to offer for a first time in. A good rule is " the
lower the guarantee, the higher the percentage". Some clubs have strict
policies regarding guarantees and you just have to accept them or not. If
the deal they're offering is bullshit, you may want to go along with it
just to establish yourself. Once you're established as a draw or a favorite
act, the deal can be adjusted. Some clubs have built in audiences that are
going to be there no matter who's playing. Don't try to tap the clubs
already established income. Try to get your pay determined by the ability
of your band.

Most booking people that are professional will most likely give you a
suggestion on exactly what to do if they don't have anything for you. If
they don't, tell them that you'll give them a call back after a while ( 2-3
weeks should be sufficient). If you get the same thing again, it may be
that the guy just doesn't want to take the time to try you out for any
number of reasons. Maybe he didn't like your tape. Maybe he liked it but
only ' OK'. Maybe he's had a bunch of bands like your band play recently
and he just doesn't want to do another band like ya'll again. Maybe he just
doesn't want to deal with new bands this week. Maybe he didn't get laid
last night. There are tons of reasons why they may not be offering you a
date.

Again, don't pester the shit out of them. Ask if they listened to your
tape. Try to go over some bands that your band would go with.  Bands that
regularly play that club and ask when they're scheduled back in there.
Tell them how much you want to play their market and you REALLY want it to
be in their club or venue. Ask them if it would be ok to call back in "a
week or so". If they say yes, thank them and let them go. Mark it on your
calendar when to call back and even though you want to call back in three
days, DON'T. (unless something comes up) If some unusual show happens to
come up that your band would be good with, go ahead and call.
yo mama!